If you have a pet or ever have there comes a time when you have to say goodbye. Hopefully it will be after a very long happy life, but sometimes it happens much sooner than we expect. Sometimes it is quick & we are taken by surprise & sometimes we see it coming, but it is still in-creditably hard. I was prompted to write this when Lazarus the bird above was standing on the bottom of his cage yesterday. This is usual for him, so I immediately went into “nurse” mode & got a hospital cage & heating pad set up to move him into what I call “ICU”. I don’t always put in a perch, but wanted it available if he could perch & wanted to. I sprinkled a little food on one end. I put the heating pad under about a 1/3 of one end & that is where he stayed for a few hours, then eventually he climbed up on a perch. I keep the cage covered with a very light weight & light colored thin sheet type material, so heat can stay in but some escape, so not too warm. I later added water & seed dishes, he is 21 years old & he is still with me this AM, but he is not perching at the moment, but not seeking the heated end of the cage. I adopted Lazarus at 18 years old & sadly he wasn’t fed a good diet for his first 18 years & he wasn’t in good condition when I got him. He has started to eat a little fresh food, but the toll on his body after years of a poor diet is showing. He is now a little over 21 yrs old & afraid I will be saying goodbye soon. I put a photo of his hospital cage below.
Knowing when to say goodbye can be hard, meaning knowing if intervention from a Veterinarian is needed. I believe in quality of life & not just quantity for any living being. I sadly have lost so many in my lifetime, human & animals & it is never easy, but I have learned when it comes to my pets I need to be their advocate. If a pet is suffering & their quality of life is rough it is hard, but we need to decide when they are in pain, discomfort or quality is not there anymore.
BoBo my cat was my first pet (fully my responsibility ) that I had that I had to make this decision for. She was 18 1/2 years old & her kidneys were falling & she was going potty outside her litter box. When I saw it changed the color of the flooring in my apartment I knew her kidneys were done. My Vet knew her time wasn’t far off & she had given me some medication to give her prior to me taking her in to say goodbye, to help calm her. She hated car rides & didn’t want her anymore stressed than necessary, so I was prepared & had the medication in advance. It was very hard to say goodbye, but I knew she wasn’t comfortable & I knew being the clean kitty she was, she seemed upset that she missed the litter box.
Ace lived to 17 & 8 months & I knew it was time when he went outside & did his business & then came back to the patio & went down & he couldn’t get back up. He was a Golden Retriever mix & he had hip dysplasia which affected his back legs, but now his front legs weren’t working. It was early AM & cold out & the Vet wasn’t open yet, so I grabbed blankets & a hot water bottle & wrapped him up & kept him warm till I could call & get him into the Vet. I called someone to help me get him into my vehicle & told the Vet’s office I’d need help when I arrived to get him from the vehicle.
Knowing when to say goodbye to those two was more obvious, because they had such obvious signs of discomfort. When it came to Sam I was unsure, he had been given a diagnosis of cancer 3 weeks prior at the age of 12 & really wasn’t acting like himself but getting around till that morning. I called my brother Tim & asked him to come over & help me decide. He was far from wanting to make that decision as him & Sam were buddies. He came over & Sam heard him come to the back door & in my small house he fell 4 times just trying to get to Tim. I told Tim he didn’t need to say a word, I knew it was time. I wasn’t up to driving so I called my sister Karen & all 3 of us went to the Vet. Tim had never been present to say goodbye to an animal, but years later it helped him when he had to say goodbye to his cat.
Where to say goodbye is something I don’t know that people think about or even know there are options. There are some wonderful people that have businesses to help by coming to your home to perform the euthanasia in your home, where your pet may feel more comfortable. I have had friends who did this for their pets, especially if the pet is stressed at a Vets office or very large & hard to get into a vehicle to take to the Vets.
How: Sometimes your pet isn’t suffering & if you have the opportunity to just be there when your pet passes away, keeping them warm & comforted & feeling loved.
If your pet is suffering, in pain or uncomfortable please contact your Vet. If it is after hours & it will be more than a short time before they are open, then contact an ER Vet & take your pet there. I have done this with my own pets & with foster pets, suffering is NOT an option. We go to the hospital ER if we are in pain & our pets deserve that same treatment.
My ferret mentor Zoo (God rest her soul) told me it was my responsibility as a pet owner to show love to my pets at the end. She helped a couple of my ferrets cross the rainbow bridge very kindly & painlessly. At times she housed 100+ ferrets & many were in hospice care. This was the first time I held a pet in my arms (my ferret) as it crossed the rainbow bridge. I will be honest I had a phobia about touching things that were dead, but she was kind, but really gave me no option. I am glad now that she did, I know my ferret knew love in those final moments & was not alone or with strangers.
I hope you don’t have to say good bye to a beloved pet anytime soon, but if you do please know you showed them love till their final moments & that is the most important thing.
Grieving a pet can take some time & as a former foster mom I recommend you wait at least 6 weeks before you bring a new pet into your home & life. I know this can sound hard for some people, but giving yourself that time can help you to make the right choice for your next pet. Let your emotions subside before you decide. Deciding when we are emotional can lead us to adopting a pet that isn’t what we really wanted or needed plus not a good fit (too young, too active, too whatever). When we take our time we can sit back & think about what we really need & want, plus what will fit into your life at this time & the future. Pets also grieve & when I had to say good bye to Sam I didn’t really think Ace would care, they weren’t really buddies. Boy was I wrong, I got home & Ace ran around the house looking for Sam all evening. He looked so sad & I let him smell Sam’s collar, but he had no idea what happened. I decided then & there that when I got another dog & had to say goodbye someday I would take the other dog along so they would know. I did this when it was time to say goodbye to Ace & I really think it helped Sydney to know Ace had died. I have shown birds that passed to other birds they were housed with & I truly believe it helped them to grieve however animals do, but it gave closer.
I hope this wasn’t too sad of a post for you, I felt I needed to talk about it at some point & this seemed like the right time as I am afraid I soon will be saying goodbye to Lazarus. He is not suffering, but I think his body is saying I’m done. I have lost two birds in this past year & all the ones I have are older or have health issues. My dogs are young, but even that is not a guarantee of longevity. Update: Lazarus is back in his cage, eating & drinking & he ate fresh food yesterday, he seems to be acting normal, still maybe a little slower moving around, but improving.
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